Behind the Scenes

After a three year stint on the road with a Beach Boys cover band, I came back to Toronto to the bleak reality of an actor's life of auditioning for burger commercials. Luckily, I met my theatre partner at this point. We met when I was asked to be a part of an amateur burlesque show at the Bovine Sex Club. I put together a little tap dance routine and took it off for the first time in front of a crowd. I was not aware that “burlesque” had a history of tassels instead of full frontal...That night, Sasha Van BonBon and I began a 20 year relationship that included 5 original pieces of cabaret theatre and art porn that has been viewed in film festivals the world over. 

Burlesque was my first induction into sensual performance. I came from a dance background. But for obvious reasons, dance was all technique and discipline while I was a young girl. Growing up I was very confused by my burgeoning sexuality. I knew I liked girls and boys...And being overtly sexual was a shameful thing. I had no place to express myself until The Scandelles was created. Our forays into burlesque morphed into Sasha writing Neon Nightz: Her memoirs of stripping in the famed stripclubs of Montreal in the 80’s and 90’s. Sasha asked me to play a few different dancers she used to work with. As stripping is considered sexwork, she asked that in order to not be a tourist, to try exotic dancing instead. And so began my career as a sensual conduit. 

It’s true that I may have never found my way into the courtesan world if I had not started dancing in clubs. I loved the intimacy of dancing one on one in a little booth. Performance that touches people in a tactile way is what I craved.  It didn’t take me long to start seeing clients outside of the club. 

I see escorting as the height of libertine performance. It is a shame that we as a society won’t condone the concept of satisfying sensual desires as a basic human need. Ultimately, my life as a courtesan was fueled by my desire to normalize pleasure seeking. When my clients were with me, they could focus their deepest desires and fantasies...The door to a world that could never be accepted in their everyday life. It is an exchange of energy that I reveled in.